When comparison rears its ugly head…
A few weeks ago I descended into an negative spiral of comparison.
I visited another speaker coach’s Facebook Group and my inner critic had a field day in my head. OMG, she has more followers than you! She’s doing a better job of engagement than you! And her brand is so similar to yours! She’s probably making more money than you! And on and on…
Theodore Roosevelt said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.”
And, boy, did my joy go out the window for a few hours that day.
But thankfully, I put my spiritual and mindset tools into practice and pretty quickly got back into a high vibe state of joy, ease and lightness of being.
Comparing yourself to others’ success, status and looks is a common theme (along with the “imposter syndrome”) for most women entrepreneurs. It’s definitely been a hot topic in my client sessions this month.
And, frankly, it sucks, doesn’t it?
Yet, I believe you can learn to navigate through it with grace and come out the other side stronger, more confident, and trusting of your unique path.
Here are 3 tips to help you shift out of the negative spiral of comparison and into a state of JOY:
1) Lean in close and comfort yourself. When you first notice comparison coming up, pause your activity as soon as you can and center your awareness on your thoughts. Breathe and notice. Write down everything you’re feeling, raw and uncensored. Don’t hold back. Then, allow the voice of your Higher Self to speak to you, or imagine what an unconditionally loving angel would say to you, and write that down.
Alternatively or in addition to journaling, read from a high vibe inspirational book, listen to an audio/video of your favorite spiritual teacher, or draw a card from an oracle deck. Let yourself be comforted and soothed by Truth and the loving light of Wisdom. Repeat as needed.
2) Reach out to gain perspective. Once you’ve supported yourself as best as you can, turn to your coach, mastermind partner, close friend, spouse, therapist or trusted colleague for a different take. Allow them to remind you of your special qualities and unique signature, and to TRUST your process, your timing, your way.
Here’s some perspective: There are 7.8 billion people on this planet! There are FAR more people who need support than there are people like you to provide it. And there is NO ONE on this planet who has your particular story, your energy or your unique light pattern. Your energy and light is what people respond to more than anything.
3) Stay in your lane with boundaries. Next time you find comparison coming up, remind yourself, as Michael Beckwith says, to: “See everyone’s success as a dimension of your success.”
And set a boundary. Say to yourself: Right now, I’m not going to go scroll through this person’s Instagram feed, visit their Facebook page or read through their website. I’m going to stay in my lane and stay focused on trusting my own unique voice and unique perspective and putting out my own unique content. Even if it’s similar to what another person is doing, no one does it or says it quite like me. And MY people are hungry for my unique signature brand of magic.
How do you handle comparison? Comment below and share your thoughts with me. I’d love to hear!